Wednesday, April 17, 2013

hell hath no fury...

Well here comes a bitch fest on my blog. I'm sorry, but I need to vent. So keep in mind there will be swearing and most likely non sense to follow. Hey it's my blog and I can use it how I see fit!

I know the past is the past. Things should be forgotten, people move on, and mostly you can't change it one dam bit. Sometimes though it doesn't stop it from hurting the present. I want my opinions, my thoughts, my feelings to account for something. All I can think is that this is karma or some payback by way of the world for what I have done. What things am I being punished for? Who can really say, but there are a few occasions I don't like to own up to what I've done. That is how I will justify this...I deserve to feel this way.

I deserve to have my feelings considered as second. I deserve to be heart broken at times only to have to hide it. I deserve to feel the same sadness fall over me just to sit in silence. No one should hear my cries or pleas. I should just accept my fate. So let this be my last...letting it all out to be never heard again.

They flirt with you, they smile at you, and you say you never know. You've been with this and been with that, but I shouldn't worry. It's fine if they act this way, after all they are your friends, I'm just your girlfriend. I should play nice and be polite, even if I feel uncomfortable.